Oh if only

If only the words that pour from our lips were filled with love 

Instead they are poisened with fear, judgment and the heaviness of past hurts 

The Ignorant man refuses to move

Where the wise sits back and listens taking it all in to build the full body of art (per say)

Fear of pain drives us to sabotage amazing possibilities 

Love frees us to thrive in them, all the walls crumble and beauty can remain.

Arrogance can blot out the strongest fire. So be careful of what you comment on, for you only have a piece of the story. 

Vulnerability is terrifying. Are you strong enough to offer it? The gamble is worth the payoff 

https://youtu.be/6esq-JfP3Ww

Was I wrong?

https://youtu.be/VQiofgco6K4

Was I wrong to believe your smile or those words that slide down like tequila with a burn at the end? Was I more than just a body or a space to kill the time, a shot to ease the pain. Another gap filler another right one for now.

I am learning lessons fast. Like that I oft choose naivety to being savvy, purely to feel the joy that the way people now operate often sucks out. Not because I'm stupid but because I'm beautifully hopeful.

My scars and cracks and trickles of tears are what make me rare; i glisten as I break and become someone new.

Funny the words we let trickle out when we least expect them, regularly misplaced or ill timed or fallacy all together.

Strengthen your wings sweet fairy as you learn to fly. Don't let the scars keep you from taking worthy risks. For we all fall sometimes.... and more often than not there's no one there but our soft raw hearts to catch us as we fall. 

Some scars are forever, some heal quickly. Either way, the soaring is worth the descent. Whether the flight be long or short, the journey is worth it. 

So cry little fairy, soar, and risk the scars....it's time to spread your wings.

House of cards....

https://youtu.be/Ug2Ki8hpxcI

"You've been with older men? Then you know that they'll hurt you and then They'll discard you."..:. House of Cards

Well well this Hit home. You see, I once

Knew an older man, destroyed me when he discarded me. However, so have others my age and even slightly younger.

You see, I don't think it is the age; rather the intent. Is it to pursue something real and containing longevity? Or simply a fling separate from affection. Or lastly, did somewhere they get lost and their focus landed strictly upon themselves 

I'm constantly battling my soft hippie heart , but now it doesn't know up from down. What's real what's not. Praying and talking with Orion regarding the intense damage one last blow might do to the leftover pieces of my heart. 

Offering my purest kindness and truest version of me, risking being broken quite possibly the last time.

Oh restless heart. Breathe in peace lovely Fae. This change in tides is scary and horrible but in someways stunning and beautiful. 

Trembling hands and a quaking voice. Tears over kind deeds; tears over losses never to be remedied.

One more closing door may be the last. Please don't let me be broken yet again. Keep me safe as I heal, ward off the pain. My life is teetering, held together like a house of cards.