Now what

We all have times in our lives where things don't go our way; or even just don't work out as hoped. Often we see this coming but don't really care, we just proceed without caution.

It could be running that yellow light, putting off that big project, putting ourselves first, or picking someone we know if we fall for it will go down in flames.

I can think of a handful of times I have put myself in the crossfire of life and pleaded the universe for rescue from the heartache ultimately I brought upon myself. 

Other times the consequences and pain were unforeseen. Maybe due to my own naive nature. 

My brother was always coming to my rescue growing up. Keeping me from  making stupid choices, wiping my tears when my heart was broken or protecting me from whatever may harm me.

Once he moved away it was up to me to navigate the waters. Being a very young single mom I was not always good at this. I would even argue I am sometimes still bad at this. Saying something I shouldn't say, getting caught up in toxic friendships, or giving so much of me that when it is time to walk away it is almost impossible because I'm so enmeshed!

So, now what?! Where's my saving grace?!

There is no knight in shining armor. No pebble throwers. It is up to me... Now what?! 

I guess, i put on my brave face, save my tears for another day and be thankful for all of you I have!